(E–pub) If You Ask Me The Collected Columns of America's Most Beloved and Irresponsible Critic AUTHOR Libby Gelman–Waxner

If You Ask Me The Collected Columns of America's Most Beloved and Irresponsible CriticEvery time i loan this book out to Friedrich Barbarossa (Gestalten Des Mittelalters Und Der Renaissance) (German Edition) people they call up and readassages aloud to me usually they have to stop laughing long enough to get started but it s always fun to hear Libby S Outrageously Funny And Shallow Criticisms s outrageously funny and shallow criticisms is a collection of columns Paul Rudnick wrote under the seudonym Libby Gelman Waxner that originally appeared in Premier Magazine It is not a new book It was ublished in 1994 On a recent trip I found a copy in Glad Day Bookshop in Toronto I bought it thinking it might be a fun vacation read It wasThe cover describes Libby as America s Most Beloved and Irresponsible Film Critic The conceit is Libby a NYC Jewish matron who has a successful career as an assistant buyer in Juniors Activewear has taken on the task writing film critiue The reviews become stream of consciousness riffs on whatever enters her mind rarely having anything at all to do with the films Oh how I miss Premiere magazine s Libby Gelman Waxner aka Paul Rudnick Barbra s only spontaneous moment in Prince of Tides comes when Nick tosses her a football and she screams My nails while Keven brings a very Laurel Canyon sensibility to the lains in Dances with WolvesMary McDonnell does her hair in a flattering shag look instead of too severe tribal braids I wonder if Libby s still reviewing moviesI d like to read her most recent reviews Fun fun fun Paul Rudnick as Libby Gelman Waxner is one of the few writers who can make me laugh out loud fun Paul Rudnick as Libby Gelman Waxner is one of the few writers who can make me laugh out loud you like movies and Jewish American Princesses of the NYC variety then Libby is for you Haven t read it for years but I believe her review of Lambada The Forbidden Dance discussed her assionate reaction that included donning a tropical atterned headband cleaning with ocean scented carpet freshener and grabbing husband Josh the orthodontist by the love handles and going wild That s how Libby rolls And she s back I believe Hi I'm Libby Gelman Waxner and I'm an assistant buyer in juniors' activewear While I find my work both rewarding and creative especially with the new knits coming in I want And so I decided to become a film criticMove over Siskel Ebert Watch out Leonard Maltin And just forget saving that aisle seat Mr Medved Libby Gelman Waxner has arrived in the critic's circle that is and the silver screen may never be the same again Witty wicked and scathingly honest If You Ask Me is a hilarious collection of her columns from Premiere magazine Just listen to Libby on some recent films and film stars PRINCE OF TIDES Barbra's only spontaneous moment in PRINCE OF TIDES comes when Nick tosses her. Read Rudnick is doing a new Libby column with PopWatch If you re a movie fan and can get your hands on a copy of this don t hesitate Like all of Paul Rudnick s writing this book made me laugh so hard I had to ut it down eriodically to compose myself before continuing Oh how I love Libby Libby who taught me to see the aging Michael Douglas as My Aunt Doris on a motorcycle Libby who upholds the importance of clean theater carpets and a nice kugel Libby who reminds us that if a top is a classic you should get it in every colorMy view of American Hollywood movies was skewed Learn English: A Beginner's Guide for ESL Learners permanently yenta years ago when these reviews first came out in Premier magazine Now when I see Leo DiCaprio stride manfully onscreen I just think Leo enough already the ladies love youut those eyebrows away before you hurt yourself And when Jennifer Lawrence tells the Who Is Gloria Steinem? press how dorky and awkward she is I think Jennifer honey I love everything you re in but if you don t stop that I ll be forced to mail you my high school marching band videos 1982 1993 inclusive and not for nothing do we call them The Blunder Years You don t know from dorkyLibby Libby Libby I might wish that you were still out there advising to always carry a spareair of dress shields in our urses for those alternating tense and sorrowful Ryan Gosling ieces or wondering out loud if Jack Nicholson is such a great cultural icon why does he walk around looking like your great uncle Schlomo with the crazy hair and the restraining orders in three counties I might wish you were still ublishing reviews that make me laugh and read assages out loud to my longsuffering wife when she s asleep or retending to be asleep with all the illows iled over her head I might even wish that the next time I m in New York we could go to Zabar s and criticize the schmaltz herring because it s always dry and then talk. A football and she screams My nailsDIANE KEATON She's a ioneer; she takes that thing that hangs in the back of your closet the thing that was too marked down to Napříč nekonečnem pass up Diane takes that thing and she doesn't call Goodwill she wraps it around her head a few timesins on a Smurf brooch and wins an OscarTHE LAST OF THE MOHICANS Daniel Day Lewis makes American actors look like giggly junior high school boys laying Nintendo during the rom; at one oint Madeleine asks Daniel what he is looking at and he says I'm looking at you Miss and let me tell you the usher had to conk me with his flashlight to make me stop whimperingDARYL HANNAH All men in America my Josh included they all wan.

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About why Hollywood hates us so much with the movies about robots turning into cars and girls in cutoff shorts that only their ob gyns can verify But I won t or I will and I ll retend not to I ll Now Pitching, Bob Feller: A Baseball Memoir pretend I m mature about this not writing reviews any business because you d want me to keep a stiff upper lip and carry aacket of brand name Kleenex in my Variance (Raise Your Weapon, purse because you can never have too many tissues on hand where Libby and movies are concerned Libby movies doublely Kleenex tissue and schmaltz herring it s all You Really Need In really need in if you ask me LOVE LOVE LOVE Libby Gelman Waxner Paul Rudnick s one track mind alter ego I used to read her columns decades ago when she still wrote for Premiere movie magazine those are the texts collected in this book Now that she s back in EW I have a friend in the US subscribe and send me the mags to the UK so I can keep up with what s hot and what s not in Libby s world Libby and Joe ueenan opened my eyes with regards to movies back in the day Based on the column written by screenwriter Paul Rudnick Jeffrey In Out Addams Family Values etc for Premiere magazine under the nom de Mermaid plume Libby Gelman Waxner Definitely aroduct of its time the mid 90s and for me then a blessed escape if only momentarily from grad work I used to subscribe to Premiere but its been years since I let it lapse in favor of decor and shelter and cooking mags One s life does change after all Hochzeit mit Hindernissen prioritieseople I do recall of decor and shelter and cooking mags One s life does change after all priorities eople I do recall book being an amusing respite from the grind of college though and people I do recall book being an amusing respite from the grind of college though and that I gave it four stars I was a loyal reader of Libby s column in Premiere magazine when I was in college and I was amused when she was resurrected in the ages of Entertainment Weekly last year This volume of columns brought me back to the late 80s and early 90s and lots of great and not so great films that I saw with my college als I love snark. T a date with Daryl Hannah A girl like Daryl we're not talking about a PhD in comparative literature; I think we're talking about hair in the eyes and not much in the way of lingerieLIBBY GELMAN WAXNER IS A GODDESS she inspires terror and worship I have known Libby for many years and she approaches film criticism with all the reverence she holds for dessert She is wise witty and completely unethical what's not to like I cannot say enough good things about this book because she has my home number If you love movies if you love to laugh if you'll believe anything then this book is for you if you ask me Paul RudnickIRREVERENT HILARIOUS Publishers WeeklySCREAMINGLY FUNNY The Advocate.